Sunday, December 16, 2007

Report Hoopty Vans.


I helped my sister and her family move recently. We had to take multiple trips back and forth to the new house. I was given the 1970 something beat up hoopty van to drive. The van wasn't easy on the eyes, to say the least. I think it used to be red..but due to rust it was a unique orange color. I was able to get to the new house without issue, the drive home was another story. I had noticed that the van was smoking a little, but didn't think it was a big deal. During the drive home I got stuck in traffic, and the van's smoke went from a light puff to blinding cloud cover. I called my brother in law and told him that I needed to get off the freeway stat! We pulled off and got stuck in more traffic. I was literally engulfed in smoke at the stop light. I couldn't see out of any of the windows ( it had about 20 ). Luckily there was a jiffy lube across the street. I pulled in, turned the engine off, and took the key out. To my surprise the engine kept running. The van was pumping massive clouds of smoke into the jiffy lube garage by now. The employees and my brother ran up to me exclaiming " turn it off!" That's when I hopped out and showed them that I had the keys in my hand..and the van was making it's own decisions now. The funniest part of the story is that once we pulled into the parking lot I had a clear view of the billboard that the van almost exploded under. The Billboard read:
" Report Smoking Vehicles "

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